Sunday, September 24, 2006

Terrorism : Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka vs Uwe Boll

I wanted to post this up before the whole fight reaction and our exclusive BREAKING NEWS story. At his entrance into the ring, Lowtax was quick to put down the entire country of Canada for harboring a "terrorist" but let us look at the true facts between Lowtax and Uwe Boll's Moral Character.



Lowtax is guilty of....
1.Posessing and distributing Child Pornography and then having a kid a few short years later. Any red flags here? Nahhh, not at all!
2.Hosting file forums for movies, pornography, mp3s and files which required payment to access which resulted in Richard Kyanka receiving an income exceeding several hundreds of thousands of dollars
3.Publicly slandering previous employers and business associates, some of whom he had signed agreements to settle disputes via arbitration with.
4.Violating the privacy of numerous people who contacted him to complain about his theft of content, the harassment of his (brainwashed) community, etc
5.Launching directly or indirectly his goon rushes on various people, websites and webmasters. Some were attacked with DDOS attacks, some were signed up to thousands of spam lists, some were called and harassed, some were stalked, some were exploited. Ebaum's world was a large entity that was stalked, packeted and harassed.
6.Lying compulsively throughout his years of life to friends, family and business associates.
7.Failing to pay a single one of his forum moderators and administrators even though they do the majority of the work on the forum, his primary source of income. Yet they continue to work near full time hours while Richard Kyanka earns an income exceeding an estimated $350,000 a year off registrations, advertisements, upgrades and dvd / cd sales.
8.Hiding behind the security of the internet. Richard Kyanka will broadcast anything he can get his hands on when it comes to those that steal his works or goes against him but yet he remains quite unpublished for contact information. Uwe Boll is easily reachable and will grant interviews to nearly anyone.
9.Exploiting every possible chance to rant about "fags", "jews", "niggers" and anyone else that isn't a white bread american. That is, unless they're sucking his cock and spewing out babies.
10.Being a poor sport and nearly crying after a few punches.




Uwe Boll is guilty of....
1. Making video game movies that some hardcore gamers don't agree with or like.
2. Challenging webmasters to a very fair boxing match in which all expenses were paid and the terms and conditions of was put in writing. Protective gear was worn by the participants all of whom were healthy and fit enough to box in the ring.
3. Not knowing how much Richard Kyanka contributed to the theft of Uwe Boll's movies. Now he knows.

Boy, Uwe Boll sure sounds like a terrorist compared to the quite schitzophrenic Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka.

The hilarious smackdown that knocked Lowtax into tearville and almost made his wife go into an asian rage :::

Video #1
Video #2 (if #1 drops)
Interview where Lowtax fights not to cry

Also, Johnny is a piece of shit.

116 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

you're no ratf

9/25/2006 9:56 AM  
Anonymous oxxiox said...

Writing a lot of words counts for nothing when they are all fucking retarded.

9/25/2006 10:53 AM  
Anonymous kfx said...

why did you capitalize "child pornography" is this some kind of code

9/25/2006 8:27 PM  
Blogger OzmaTheWhale said...

yes, it is For sUre some kind of Code oK YOU silly ass.

9/25/2006 9:08 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

shut the fuck up deckchair variations

9/26/2006 12:20 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

also a bit of advice: the only reason anyone liked r21c was because of the comics, and once they got lame everyone bailed so if you think that people will give a fuck about you whoever you are and what you think without some kind of accompanying gimmick you are mistaken

9/26/2006 12:22 AM  
Blogger OzmaTheWhale said...

What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.

9/26/2006 7:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'M HERE TO EXPOSE THE CONSPIRACY! THEY SHALL ALL BE OUTED FOR THEIR SINS! NO MORE SECRETS AND LIES!!! O GOD ARE YOU GUYS LISTENING TO ME????

9/26/2006 7:20 AM  
Anonymous flaflonyfous said...

Is this a spoof of a spoof of a spoof or is it serious or what

9/26/2006 11:33 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

it's serious and that is why it is so very sad

9/26/2006 12:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I must have missed the insane rationale for the "lowtax is a pedophile" accusation

9/26/2006 7:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've always found matches between internet geeks and professional boxers to be "very fair" ... what, was your brain eaten by worms while you slept in your double-wide in a drunken, racist stupor?

9/26/2006 7:06 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

this is definately that same guy that was starting shit with lowtax over the pedophile stuff on that gaming board they both ended up getting banned on

9/26/2006 7:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hurrr, Lowtax am paedophile cos he r not nice to me :(

9/26/2006 7:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You know, calling Lowtax a racist (which he most definitely isn't) then saying that his wife will go into an "asian rage" is pretty much the height of hypocrisy.

9/26/2006 7:19 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hahahahahahahahahahahahaha

9/26/2006 7:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nice post...reminds me of the Salem Witch Trials...

So can you actually back up any of your accusations or are you just bitter because you got permabanned at some point?

9/26/2006 7:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I can't see the interview part. What do I need to view it?

9/26/2006 7:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You're still a fucking idiot

9/26/2006 7:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think you may have forgotten the part where eBaums is a shithole that profits off openly stolen content and has had litigation carried against it for such (since 2003.)

Moreover, it's different from SA's use of unlicensed photos in that SA neither claims the originals to be their own, nor crops watermarks.

But as long as it makes a convenient victim, all that is just fine, right?

P.S. One of those poor sites that the Goons have knocked out is a child porn forum. Strange behavior for an alleged child porn lover, isn't it? Similarly, isn't it strange that a racist would spend so many Weekend Webs making fun of other racists?

Oh, right, you'll just scream hypocrisy again.

9/26/2006 7:30 PM  
Anonymous Gay Lover said...

Lowtax is my interacial gay lover, how dare you accuse him of pedophilia and racism! I am a proud black 89 year old gay man and he loves me for it.

9/26/2006 7:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I for one had no idea that EVERY MOVIE CRITIC IN THE WORLD was a "hardcore gamer," and I am a better person for learning this information. Thank you!

9/26/2006 7:37 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What does FYAD stand for?

9/26/2006 7:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Boy, this got commented fast.

Goon rush. Way to prove the dude's point.

Regardless, you have to learn how to write something to be taken seriously. First of all, no one will be prompted to action if you're saying "fuck you for being a fucking dimwit." You're as bad as the person you're insulting, in that case.

As for a quick rebuttal to your "moral arguments," you have no evidence to back up your claims (not like I want it, but still,) and you should know Uwe Boll's movies are universally panned as terrible.

9/26/2006 7:40 PM  
Anonymous Khanstant said...

They stalked and harrassed poor eBaums world after they stole SA's content! Poor eBaums, I feel seo bad for a website that makes profit off of doing nothing but putting up other peopels content on their site, generally without the creators permission! THE TRAGEDY. Eric Bauman must feel so bad with that paycheck in his hands because some SA goods along with YTMND made DOs attack, that mainly affted eBaum's forums! NOOOOO!

9/26/2006 7:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

SA rocks!

9/26/2006 7:49 PM  
Anonymous Johnson said...

This has to be some kind of parody, no one could be dumb enough to put so much time into something like this, I mean Jesus Christ. You can't just call someone a racist and and a pedophile because you don't agree with there sense of humour, what the fuck is wrong with you?

9/26/2006 7:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Do you have any proof of your claims? Or are you just a dink?

9/26/2006 7:59 PM  
Anonymous Jangofeet said...

This site is hilarious! What's your goon name? A joke-site this funny could only have been made by a goon. Unless it isn't supposed to be funny, but that's unlikely. I mean seriously, you'd have to be a half-retarded chimp with torettes who was taught to operate a keyboard using old silverware to press the keys in order to write with this level of hilarious insanity and poor grammar and be serious about it. Good work, man good work. ROFL.

9/26/2006 8:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Whatever you might think of Rich Kyanka, Uwe Bolls' movies suck. So does any blog that relies upon siding with E-Baum's World as a supporting argument.

Try again.

9/26/2006 8:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

9/26/2006 8:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I would defend Uwe Boll to the grave!

9/26/2006 8:27 PM  
Anonymous WhaleWhacker said...

Well, just to simplify...

OzmaTheWhale, grab Uwe Boll's hands, and go fuck each other...

Get a Life dude...IT'S JUST A COMIC SITE.

Why don't you apply to a job at Jack Thompson's Law Office? I think you two would get along too well...

9/26/2006 8:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Okay, ozmathewhale, you've gotten your attention. Now for God's sake, stop wasting your time being bitter. Go do something productive. Bake a fucking cake or something.

9/26/2006 8:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

oh fagmathekiddyraper get a life possibly try and do something productive with your life. if you put this much into blogging as you did into life then you may have possibly gotten laid by now. oh well so sad really. if you cant see humour in anything you might as well go kill yourself. btw what proof do you have about all of this slanderous accusations about lowtax you faggot?

9/26/2006 8:42 PM  
Blogger -Jon Rowe said...

You Lose, Good Day Sir

9/26/2006 8:46 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Kill yourself.

9/26/2006 8:46 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

sa's pretty damn funny

9/26/2006 8:52 PM  
Anonymous CaptJim said...

MAAAAN THOSE ARE LOTS OF WORDS THERE


SHOULD I READ THESE WORDS


NO

9/26/2006 8:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I suppose when you say "we exist to expose SA" you meam "you" as in singular, right. SA is just a funny internet site. If all this was true why would Lowtax link to this piece of shit blog in the first place, thats right I came here from the SA front page.

9/26/2006 8:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is meant to be facetious or self-parody, right?
Right?

9/26/2006 8:56 PM  
Anonymous IM ON DA INTERNETZ & EVRYTHEN I SEZ IZ RITE said...

You sir, are funny! Why don't you go shoot some jews to celebrate your internet righteousness? I mean, you're racist right? I can't see why you wouldn't be, as I don't like you. Or maybe I'm using your internet babble incorrectly. Ah, yes! My mistake indeed. You're a pedophile and a racist!
There we go, after examination of the proper use of your internet slander, I've come to the conclusion that you like jerking off to kids as long as they're white.

9/26/2006 9:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

To all the people bitching about eBaum's world stealing and making a profit off of it:

Get over it. SomethingAwful had an extensive file library, openly acknowledged by the moderators and administrators and Lowtax himself. If you spoke of it off site, you were permabanned. SomethingAwful is in no position to cry about theft of content.

And I got news for the tard who thinks that just because you leave in a watermark and don't claim it as your "is different" -- hot tip, shithead: it's still a copyright violation. But congratulations on being a law school flunk out apologist relativist fuckstick waste of human flesh.

Forget it, something awful stopped being funny years ago, around the same time lowtax got whatever fuck off cumdumpster that could suck him off the hardest to start updating the site instead of him. Anything to shut down a virulent bastion of unfunniness is good by me.

9/26/2006 9:03 PM  
Blogger Famous Thomas said...

From now on, No more talking from you until you have something intelligent to say.

P.S. I can't believe you actually wrote "internets" in a previous post.

9/26/2006 9:03 PM  
Blogger CrazedCommando said...

Ok, Uwe Boll is a fucking horrible movie maker. And whoever writes for this site is a big moron. But Kyanka is still a whiny bitch.

9/26/2006 9:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymoose said...

As long as there is the Internet, there are idiots. There were quite a number more than just 'hardcore gamers' that didn't like his movies. I doubt you could find more than 3, if any, reviews from professional critics that actually say that Boll's game-to-movie adaptations are good.

And while I'm not really a forum goon of SA, I am brainwashed. Now give me your armpit hairs, for Lowtax subliminally telling me to eat them. No, I don't mean the author of this blog, I mean everyone's who reads this.


... I mean it. Give me your hairs.

9/26/2006 9:08 PM  
Anonymous CaptJim said...

NEWSFLASH:

"CRAZEDCOMMANDO" FOUND WITH PENIS IN HIS MOUTH

9/26/2006 9:08 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.What the hell do you think this is penny arcade? The so called gimmick of this blog is to put it all out there. Anything that can be confirmed regarding admin history for example.

The SA community is so sick and twisted that they cannot even realize that the person they are defending and stroking constantly is a pedophile, kingpin of a digital theft network, compulsive liar and arrogant asshole with no respect for others.

So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck.

9/26/2006 9:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great job citing your sources, jackass.

9/26/2006 9:10 PM  
Anonymous AwesomeAndroid said...

This is great stuff. I'm glad you exposed Kyanka as an awful man and a pedo-racist. I heard it on the 'internets' from a rabid Uwe Bolls fan (my keyboard physically spasmed when I typed 'fan' and 'Uwe Bolls' so close together) which makes it instantly true!

I agree with the guy saying SA isn't as good as it used to be, but still, damn. Chill out dude.

9/26/2006 9:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wait, is this blog writer guy a furry? I bet he is.

9/26/2006 9:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh man you are a great writer! Wait... no... sorry I was mistaking you for someone with a fucking brain.

9/26/2006 9:19 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

SA varies in humor value from day to day. Sometimes it's terrible, sometimes it's hysterical, usually it's somewhere in between. I'm not a goon, there's no way I'd pay ten bucks to access any forum. I have no idea about this crap about pederasty, but given how viciously they harass the pervs he's at the very least starting to atone for whatever he may have hypothetically done. I too do not understand why he would marry, and have a child with, a woman of Asian heritage if he were some sort of white supremacist.

Granted, he has a large following of mouth-breathing idiots who swarm whoever he speaks against. But this is the internet. People will do the same thing in defense of celebrities who don't even know they exist when some random bozo criticizes said celebrity's latest cameo. And it's entirely possible that the attention has made him insufferably arrogant, but again, that's nothing unique.

As for comparing this to a cult, let alone the mother of all cults, Scientology (as you did in the first entry)...dude, S T F U.

9/26/2006 9:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The sheer idiocy of your page is silly. All the videos prove is that he went in there and took some punches, and then talked about how Uwe Boll was ful of shit afterwards. It's true. Uwe Boll *is* full of shit. After trying to watch House of the Dead, I know that to be a fact.

9/26/2006 9:24 PM  
Anonymous CaptJim said...

SO FUCK THE GIMMICK BULLSHIT

9/26/2006 9:27 PM  
Anonymous SPIDERMAN said...

HOW DO I SHOT WEB?

9/26/2006 9:29 PM  
Anonymous Rev. Dr. Faux said...

First off, you are an idiot. Where do you have any credentials to analyze and categorize SA as a cult? Are Gaia, 4Chan or YTMND cults too? Is any place that might post something that could possibly disgust you a cult?

Lowtax is one of our Greatest Uber-Americans. This man has put his neck out, his OWN neck, in the sake of comedy. We don't all agree with everything he and his editors post on SA, but the beauty of the internet makes it that if you don't like something YOU CAN FUCKING GO SOMEWHERE ELSE!

Now, Lowtax's "stolen" content is another great point to bring up. Take a look at any humor website. ANY. More than likely you will find the same picture of the fat chick in hose and pumps on her dinner date with the guy her friends paid to go out with her so she'd have enough confidence not to commit suicide (or slaughter on her part) for one more day. People say "You can't post pictures of my fat mom on your website, that's copyright infringement!" Seriously, if copyright infringement meant anything on the internet, there would not be an ebaumsworld.com.

Are your issues valid? No. But people who 'expose' the truth are usually a bit more unbiased in their writings, and don't return criticism with "So fuck the gimmick bullshit, this is here to expose the SA staff and their past. Like it or hate it, I don't give a fuck." Really, if anyone takes you seriously after that comment, they need to be check for brain hemorraging.

You have a purpose in this site, and above all of that, I respect your opinion and I TRULY ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR EFFORT! But the rants you're making are not helping your cause. You are making your self look like a flaming idiot. Flaming in the sense of you are on fire and do not realize that every time you type something on your keyboard, a child in Bosnia dies of AIDS.

Do the internet a favor, and stop talking.
==================================


At least until you cite some sources.

9/26/2006 9:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

HELP I'M BEING FURSECUTED!

9/26/2006 9:33 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You fail to mention where Uwe Boll lied to the participants about getting proper training for the event, when none was given whatsoever.

9/26/2006 9:37 PM  
Blogger dweezil said...

Is this some kind of joke? Honestly, this seems like the sort of "so insane it's hilarious" sort of stuff SA would write... Lowtax and Zack Parsons have written very similar stuff. Albeit in a humorous vein. Haha.

9/26/2006 9:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

<< And I got news for the tard who thinks that just because you leave in a watermark and don't claim it as your "is different" -- hot tip, shithead: it's still a copyright violation. >>

i sure hope *you* didn't go to law school, because that's not even a *sentence*.

9/26/2006 9:51 PM  
Anonymous rusty said...

Oh my god but this is all so freaking funny. Or maybe I'm just drunk. I <3 lowtax.

9/26/2006 9:58 PM  
Anonymous CSL said...

You just gotta love the 'internets'. On one hand we have a writer for a comedy site, and on the other we have some asswipe who believes that that because this writer has has an amusing opinion alot of people laugh at, the world is gonna collapse because he is being a normal human being and expressing his feelings for the sake of comedy. Like everyone else said, if you don't like it, go somewhere else. I'm pretty sure anyone with the intelligence you have can easily move the mouse pointer to the Address Bar, type a URL, and click 'Enter'. Here, lemme try it out and see how long it takes me. Holy crap... Like... 3 seconds... Sweet Jesus that was rough. I know it sounds like im a hypocrite when I say this, cause you probably think I hate this site. I don't, I find it amusing that you're criticizing a critic for a comedy site, no less harsher than you claim he criticizes something. But then again you may just be a moron if you can be mad that a site called "Something Awful", may have something you find awful.

Then again, this could be a prank site. But I have my doubts.

But then again what do I know. Im a stupid teenager.

9/26/2006 10:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

lowtax more like childpornographytax am i rite because your 10 bux goes towards his evil network of child pornography

9/26/2006 10:08 PM  
Anonymous Michael said...

You know, after recently reading about a newspaper columist who got in trouble for creating alter-egos to post positive comments in his blog, I have to wonder if some of these posts by "anonymous" are, infact, from this blog's creator. I mean, seriously, the stupidity expressed in both is so similar it seems almost impossible for them not to be the same person. And by the way, what exactly does "asian rage" mean?

9/26/2006 10:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

you are teh sex

9/26/2006 10:27 PM  
Anonymous soul76 said...

good thing something finally has the nerve to expose the danger SA poses to our young!
with all the evidence i got from your site i can now be sure that it was the right decision to lock my son in the cellar where he eats only fishheads to purify his soul and burn his pc in a ritual blaze fueled with rum and evolution theory books! this will teach him the values of love, life and the america of our great lord and will drive the poison of sa back to the devil whence it came.
GO WHALE! btw are you are sperm whale? my husband left me and i am lonely.

9/26/2006 10:28 PM  
Anonymous Capn Satire said...

Congradulations, you have managed to somehow make Lowtax look like a hero by the end of that idiotic rant.

Jesus chirst you need to back up what you write for it to have any credibility at all, yes, even on the internet.

9/26/2006 10:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't care what anyone says... this is hilarious!!! (and it's obvious that it's Lowtax making fun of himself... but since I can't prove anything, I'll just let it be and revel in the genius of it all.)

9/26/2006 10:34 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sixty Nine!

9/26/2006 10:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Haha, you call Lowtax a whiny asshole? LO FUCKING L. Way to go you glorious hypocrite. You have dedicated an entire blog and many hours of your time to ONE INDIVIDUAL. You are the epitome of "useless internet crusader". Go to hell you stupid piece of shit.

9/26/2006 10:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

P.S. When you can take a few rounds with a pro after no training, you can talk about people not taking pain, jackass.

9/26/2006 10:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Man you're just pissed off because no one liked your fat girlfriend

9/26/2006 11:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Are you insane? Why can't you let this go? You paid to be at an event so that you could stalk lowtax and his wife some more. Give it a rest.

9/26/2006 11:15 PM  
Blogger OzmaTheWhale said...

I posted a blog in reaction to those of you that decided to spam your hate or criticism. This blog does not exist for you.

The asian rage comment was based off a comment that Lowtax's wife made on the forum after the fight. She claimed that she was about to run into the ring like a crazy asian wife to pummel Uwe Boll.

Questioning my sanity are we? Well, I would say I'm much more sane than a man that thinks he can walk away from a past full of child porn, animal porn, piracy and so on and so on. Plus I wouldn't go into a boxing match without the expectation that I'm going to get punched.

You all act like Lowtax was not fit or had some crippling level of retardation (his is only mild). He had padded gear on for christs sake.

The seriousness of this blog is up to you to interpret.

9/26/2006 11:30 PM  
Anonymous WhaleWhacker said...

Oh my, you're right: This site CAN'T be serious..

Only one thing, Whale: Do you realize how much publicity you're giving to Something Awful?

Think about it, mate ;)

9/26/2006 11:38 PM  
Anonymous Odysseus, aka nobody said...

I'm a furry and I think this blog sucks.

9/26/2006 11:38 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You have it backwards Whalewhacker. Something Awful is giving THIS site attention.

9/26/2006 11:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I thought the photoshop 'theft' thing was about people using photoshopped images that SA goons had generated... they arent claiming to own a copyright, but they did put the jokes together... a thousand goons working nonstop to churn out jokes are bound to make at least SOMEthing funny, I thought the big deal was about taking these images and posting them to another site as if the new poster had authored it. Which, by the way, is lame. Right?

9/27/2006 12:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Isnt it 'libel', when in print? Not slander?

9/27/2006 12:10 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Truly, the internet makes you stupid.

9/27/2006 12:32 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I want the 5 minutes of my life back.

9/27/2006 12:37 AM  
Anonymous SpookyElectric said...

So.. to hear his side, need I even direct you to http://www.somethingawful.com ?

Watched the vid. Really didn't seem that bad. Granted, Lowtax got beat around, but he did make a whole round at least. I think you're looking into it a little to much, dude. What with your obession to Lowtax, one would think he must have done you wrong or something... sadly that makes this site WAY creepier then SomethingAwful.. even IF there was child porno there.

9/27/2006 1:42 AM  
Anonymous SpookyElectric said...

So.. to hear his side, need I even direct you to http://www.somethingawful.com ?

Watched the vid. Really didn't seem that bad. Granted, Lowtax got beat around, but he did make a whole round at least. I think you're looking into it a little to much, dude. What with your obession to Lowtax, one would think he must have done you wrong or something... sadly that makes this site WAY creepier then SomethingAwful.. even IF there was child porno there.

9/27/2006 1:45 AM  
Blogger The Black Enigma said...

LOWTAX IS SUCH A HYPOCRITE! I WOULD NEVER BE A HYPOCRITE. I WOULD NEVER ACCUSE SOMEONE OF RACISM AND THEN REFERENCE CARLOS MENCIA IN MY INCREASINGLY OFFENSIVE DIGS AT THEIR WIFE'S ETHNICITY.

BECAUSE I AM A GOOD PERSON.

...Man, there's somebody who needs the shit beaten out of him. Maybe we can line him up against Boll. EVERYONE WINS

9/27/2006 2:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Man, I hope the writer of this blog is actually a little kid that got molested to fuck something, because it would be hilarious if said person had their innocence torn away from them because holy shit are you insane.

9/27/2006 2:38 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Facts of GTFO

9/27/2006 3:37 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Uhm, I didn't see Lowtax cry. You try getting beat about the head for a few minutes and see if you don't end up a little rumdumb.

Also, what's this Asian Rage bullshit? You complain about the racism on SA, and then make a comment like that?

Is it strange that you have post after post of insanely long rants that are obsessive to or even beyond the point of your average stalker?

Get a life.

ps I'm not a goon either.

9/27/2006 6:06 AM  
Anonymous Drat said...

Regarding point 9. You must be reading a different version of the site than I have.

9/27/2006 6:17 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

intense. ozmathewhale has demonstrated the ultimate fail in a spoof of a spoof in that it has come full circle and is just the same as serious. or maybe this the point. this blog is meta. -pass (for effort)

9/27/2006 6:20 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

--And by the way, what exactly does "asian rage" mean?--

I am guessing flipping out and beating people like bruce lee? cause he did kick ass.

I am not even going to comment on the article, lot of people have said stuff, some just as stupid as the article itself, but others with much better points.

Like SA or not this is funny to read.

- V

9/27/2006 7:01 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think the cult stuff, pirating, child molesting charges, etc are pretty much bullshit, but I'm not even an official SAGoon or anything so I won't get into that.

But the arguments you present there lost any credibility (which is hard to do, since you basically started with none) when you lied on the video descriptions. I never noticed his wife flying into an "Asian Rage." I didn't even see/hear her in the video. Second, the interview in which Lowtax supposedly fights off tears...well, he seemed in pretty good spirits. Cracked some jokes about Uwe Boll, himself, and the event in general. I never saw him choked up, angry, or even mildly bothered.

You just make things up to support your viewpoint, even when there's NO evidence of what you're saying. Are you a Republican?

9/27/2006 7:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

are you lowtax?

9/27/2006 7:37 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

this is retarded

9/27/2006 8:33 AM  
Anonymous HarmonyInChaos said...

Ozmathewhale you state that the he was wearing full padding in the match, but have you ever been punched full force while wearing pads? It still doesn't feel nice, if you'd like to experience it you can come to my kickboxing school and I can show you and then post pictures of you crying and write whiney blogs about you.

9/27/2006 10:49 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear homofag,

Please remove the sand from your vagina.

Lowtax is guilty of....
1.Posessing and distributing Child Pornography and then having a kid a few short years later. Any red flags here? Nahhh, not at all!
Interesting, accusasitions but no proof. You sir are a pedophile!!
2.Hosting file forums for movies, pornography, mp3s and files which required payment to access which resulted in Richard Kyanka receiving an income exceeding several hundreds of thousands of dollars
Oh dear god no, not capitalism!
3.Publicly slandering previous employers and business associates, some of whom he had signed agreements to settle disputes via arbitration with.
No one has ever done this ever and it is completely innapropriate for a comedian.
4.Violating the privacy of numerous people who contacted him to complain about his theft of content, the harassment of his (brainwashed) community, etc
Yes, Lowtax is responsible for the actions of people who find his website funny or are on his forums. I blame Lowtax for playing allowing me to play Dead Rising today, I will sue him.
5.Launching directly or indirectly his goon rushes on various people, websites and webmasters. Some were attacked with DDOS attacks, some were signed up to thousands of spam lists, some were called and harassed, some were stalked, some were exploited. Ebaum's world was a large entity that was stalked, packeted and harassed.
A large entity of douchebags that deserved it.
6.Lying compulsively throughout his years of life to friends, family and business associates.
Lowtax is the only man in the universe who has ever lied. Ever.
7.Failing to pay a single one of his forum moderators and administrators even though they do the majority of the work on the forum, his primary source of income. Yet they continue to work near full time hours while Richard Kyanka earns an income exceeding an estimated $350,000 a year off registrations, advertisements, upgrades and dvd / cd sales.
Ii am sure they are fored to moderate, I heard they were beaten and raped if they stopped to even sleep. Can we say Volunteer work?
8.Hiding behind the security of the internet. Richard Kyanka will broadcast anything he can get his hands on when it comes to those that steal his works or goes against him but yet he remains quite unpublished for contact information. Uwe Boll is easily reachable and will grant interviews to nearly anyone.
Lowtax writes funny articles, Boll makes shitty movies.
9.Exploiting every possible chance to rant about "fags", "jews", "niggers" and anyone else that isn't a white bread american. That is, unless they're sucking his cock and spewing out babies.
More zionist lies from you faggo-commie-liberal pansies
10.Being a poor sport and nearly crying after a few punches.
Wow, that dosen't say a thing about Lowtax's moral character, good job.

Grow a sense of humor and congrats on getting your piss poor whine-site some hits.

9/27/2006 1:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i hate SA as much as the next guy (besides Dr. David Thorpe, that man is a genius), but defending Uwe Boll's movies as films "only hardcore gamers don't like" is like calling AIDS a disease "only hardcore immune system fans don't like".

9/27/2006 1:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lowtax must not be that bad if you're still throwing such a huge bitch-fit after he banned you for posting that disgusting video of you and your landwhale girlfriend on the SA forum. After all, if he's such a terrible person and runs such a horrible website, why would you still be crying over getting banned?

9/27/2006 2:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow, what an enlightening and COMPLETELY unbiased judgement! Thank you for showing me the way!

Eat a dick.

9/27/2006 2:58 PM  
Anonymous lol said...

Lowtax a cult leader? Bwaahahahhaa!!! All he has is more fans that Mr. Boll, don't be hatin!

Love, matt "krinkels" jolly


(seriously, who keeps letting that guy direct movies?)

9/27/2006 3:26 PM  
Anonymous KRINKELS said...

GO TO MY WEBSITE!!! I'LL FIGHT YOU IF YOU DON'T LIKE MY FLASH MOVIES BECAUSE I'M A RETARDED IDIOT STUPIDFACE GERMAN LUNATIC! I SWEAR TO GOD!!!!

www.krinkels.net
www.krinkels.net
www.krinkels.net


=D

9/27/2006 3:38 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I didn't realize I was in a cult until just now. I'm very glad the Internets have gems like you to help out the rest of us 'babes in the woods.'

Maybe you could next turn your sights to national and international politics? I'm sure I'd probably vote for a hard-hitting, clear-seeing, cut-to-the-chase, bottom-line chap like you seem to be.

Hopefully we can be pals,
Trevor.

9/27/2006 3:56 PM  
Blogger Debt said...

This blog isn't me.

9/27/2006 5:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ozmathewhale is?
A)Cool
B)Lame
C)A Fag

Hmm....i wonder what teh awnzer is A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag A Fag

Go FUCK YOU DAD LAMEASS

9/27/2006 5:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This may just be the single most retarded website I have ever seen.

I don't have an SA forums account and actually only really watch the occasional batch of materials produced by the forums, but I'd like to point out you're pitching a tent over an INTERNET ENTERTAINMENT WEBSITE.

Congrats, you are a champion.

9/27/2006 6:04 PM  
Blogger OzmaTheWhale said...

SA is not just an entertainment site which is the point of this blog. It is like a bar with a bunch of drug dealing, prostitution and murders going on in the back. Would you still call that a bar?

9/27/2006 6:33 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

gotta love the picture of Lowtax looking all down and out, then there's Uwe with some look of I just defeated the nazis in a dick sucking contest.

9/27/2006 6:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Become an hero

9/27/2006 6:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I wouldn't have a bar any other way if it were like that. But it's not, and the analogy is horrible.

9/27/2006 7:08 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

this blog makes me miss debt's shitty one :(

9/28/2006 12:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't know what's worse, this blog or the 100+ shitty comments by GBS faggots and non-registered SA lurkers who want to hang with the cool kids and are trying really hard to be funny

9/28/2006 12:11 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"a bar with a bunch of drug dealing, prostitution and murders"

Ok now I get it. You really are bat shit insane.

9/28/2006 12:47 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

SOMEONE NEEDS TO CLEAN THE SAND OUT OF THEIR VAGINA

9/28/2006 7:56 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wait, there's prostitutes on SA?? Someone link me. Brains brains drool snort, the SomethingAwful is my Jesus. Praise Lowtax....BRAAAAAIIIINNNSSSS.

9/28/2006 9:25 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You know, i think that deep down, you are a Fundamentalist Christian in denial. You sure write like one.

9/28/2006 9:25 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Seriously, you got banned from the forums didn't you?

9/29/2006 6:27 PM  

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